The 12 Days of Christmas – A Cheesy Landing Page Optimization Lament

By | Google+ , December 23rd, 2009 in Funny, Landing Pages | 4 comments
funny pictures of cats with captions

What do you want for Christmas? (Photo Credit: ICanHasCheezburger.com)

For the holiday season, I’ve taken a quick stab at re-writing that 12 Days of Christmas ditty. If Christmas ain’t really your thing, then hopefully the lolcat is enough to bring a smile to your face.

Remember to sing along. Preferably after a few egg nog’s or Christmas Ale’s. (It’ll be funnier).

On the 1st day of Christmas my true love gave to me…

  • A typo in a CTA

On the 2nd day of Christmas my true love gave to me…

  • 2 dove turtles – needless to say they didn’t convert because large tortoise-like animals covered in moisturizing soap doesn’t make much sense to anyone.
  • and a typo in a CTA

On the 3rd days of Christmas my true love gave to me…

  • 3 french pens – no matter how I move my wrist, these pens write in French. I don’t even speak french.
  • 2 dove turtles
  • and a typo in a CTA

On the 4th day of Christmas my true love gave to me…

  • 4 appalling words – in my H1 tag. Sigh.
  • 3 french pens
  • 2 dove turtles
  • and a typo in a CTA

On the 5th day of Christmas my true love gave to me…

  • Fiiiiiiiiiive gold PPC ads on Bing – (sounds like ring. Work with me here)
  • 4 appalling words
  • 3 french pens
  • 2 dove turtles
  • and a typo in a CTA

On the 6th day of Christmas my true love gave to me…

  • 6 clients a-paying – sweeeet!
  • 5 goooooold ads on Bing
  • 4 appalling words
  • 3 french pens
  • 2 dove turtles
  • and a typo in a CTA

On the 7th day of Christmas my true love gave to me…

  • 7 Accountants grinning – thanks to #6
  • 6 clients a-paying
  • 5 goooooold ads on Bing
  • 4 appalling words
  • 3 french pens
  • 2 dove turtles
  • and a typo in a CTA

On the 8th day of Christmas my true love gave to me…

  • 8 affiliates a-milking – no surprise there
  • 7 accountants grinning
  • 6 clients a-paying
  • 5 goooooold ads on Bing
  • 4 appalling words
  • 3 french pens
  • 2 dove turtles
  • and a typo in a CTA

On the 9th day of Christmas my true love gave to me…

  • 9 ladies dancing – I’m not going to change that for anyone, so let’s just say they’re dancing on your landing page wearing Santa hats.
  • 8 affiliates a-milking
  • 7 accountants grinning
  • 6 clients a-paying
  • 5 goooooold ads on Bing
  • 4 appalling words
  • 3 french pens
  • 2 dove turtles
  • and a typo in a CTA

On the 10th day of Christmas my true love gave to me…

  • 10 conversions a-leaping
  • 9 ladies dancing
  • 8 affiliates a-milking
  • 7 accountants grinning
  • 6 clients a-paying
  • 5 goooooold ads on Bing
  • 4 appalling words
  • 3 french pens
  • 2 dove turtles
  • and a typo in a CTA

On the 11th day of Christmas my true love gave to me…

  • 11 leads converting – woohooo, here’s to Lead Gen Forms!!!
  • 10 conversions a-leaping
  • 9 ladies dancing
  • 8 affiliates a-milking
  • 7 accountants grinning
  • 6 clients a-paying
  • 5 goooooold ads on Bing
  • 4 appalling words
  • 3 french pens
  • 2 dove turtles
  • and a typo in a CTA

On the 12th day of Christmas my true love gave to me…

  • 12 drummers drumming – to the beat of 12 hillbillies singing this beautiful song in a swamp while wearing Unbounce t-shirts!!!!!
  • 11 leads converting
  • 10 conversions a-leaping
  • 9 ladies dancing
  • 8 affiliates a-milking
  • 7 accountants grinning
  • 6 clients a-paying
  • 5 goooooold ads on Bing
  • 4 appalling words
  • 3 french pens
  • 2 dove turtles
  • and a typo in a CTA

Happy Holidays!!!

— Unbounce

About The Author

Photo of Oli Gardner

Co-Founder of Unbounce. Oli has seen more landing pages than anyone on the planet. He is an opinionated writer and international speaker on Conversion Centered Design. You should follow Oli on Twitter
» More blog posts by

Comments

  1. Carl Schmidt says:

    BWA HA HA HA. I wanna see you on YouTube belting this out…

  2. rick says:

    funny one Oli!

  3. Jane Howitt says:

    Excellent! Made me smile, even though I’m feeling sorry for myself with the flu. Just the tonic I needed :)